Saturday, November 29, 2008

in doubt

I didn't want to blog this. I have been genuinly hurt by it. I know that my skin is WAY to thin, that I judge myself by the way other see me. I know that in everyday, we are tested, I know that even though I seem tough, I am a fragile egg shell.... SO....Just when I am feeling fairly good about myself. There is always someone to set me straight. I am glad it came on Thanksgiving too, at the Thanksgiving table ... NOT.

I was told in not so many words that:

1. "helping raccoons was just wrong"

2. "would I help a homeless person if they came to our (WRC) door?"

3. "There are some many people in need...We were essentially taking food from the homeless"

4. "Where do we draw the line at caring for an animal.... you know the list, a cricket, fish, slug.... and so on.

It is hard even for me to blog about this. I guess I just have things a bit wrong. I don't know. I think that God wants me take care of all his creatures. To love animals as well as humans. I feel each life is given by God. I don't know. I just don't know. What does someone say to those questions. I just said nothing. You know those out of body experiences?? When you can see yourself? I just looked sad. They just can't see how much they cut me down when I am with them.

Sorry for such a bummer of a blog. Just feel kind of sad today!
K~

5 comments:

bobbione8y said...

what the? i am trying to picture this scene and imagine where those comments came from.

of course, helping animals is not wrong. God most surely DID design them, and wants us to learn compassion and caring from them.

sometimes, i have christian friends who are rather mean about those who love animals deeply. i think they have become confused by sitting on their high horses thinking that Jesus only cared for people, that they lose sight of the fact that God exists in all living things, and many of us see Him in animals and our connections to them.

so there. i KNOW you would help a homeless person if you saw one :) and yes, i know that you know the difference between a child and a raccoon. what you do on wednesday night still counts, no matter what #$%^& thinks.

so there. sorry you are hurting dear, it was not called for to say that to you.

K~ said...

Thanks Bob. I was in a bit of a shock as to how that all happened. I still feel useful. Just not going to chat about it much other than in my blog and with the kids, who think it's the neatest job ever. K~

Karen said...

Holy crap. What you are doing is GOOD. It is helpful, and it fulfills you. How on earth can that be wrong?

Did this person want you to take all the grubs down to the shelter for Thanksgiving dinner?

Rani said...

you know that saying...

sticks and stones, blah blah blah

I think it's a load of crap, pardon my junior French.

words, given the chance, can feel as sharp as a knife and stay for a lot longer than any knife would stay in a wound

just this morning someone told me I was selfish for staying home with my children and I attribute nothing to the economy when I don't 'earn money'

that was just the tip of the ice berg put in nicey nice words for the comments section, truth is he hurt me and I felt cornered and intimidated and I wanted to be all 'big" about it and just let it go, but it has been eating at me all day and it probably will forever

i feel your pain and will pray for you as soon as I can calm myself down from my own personal problem with words that sting

i would blog about it but his wife reads my blog fervently and I just can't risk her getting hurt, too

grrrr I just wish I could forget this more easily

I wish we were all just nice enough to say I'm sorry and I didn't mean it, instead being irrational and mean to each other because I complained about him wanting to go hunting with my husband after I had not seen said hubby for three days

I suppose it's too much to ask for the entire world to go back to kindergarten and learn manners again, huh?

I think you are blessed to have a job that you love and should not be bothered about what other people think, I know it's not that easy though. Lots of people have opinions about other people's lives. I don't feel we should have the right to attack each other for something we really feel strongly about, it's just not very nice...

K~ said...

Thanks so much guys.

Rani, To stay home and raise your children is the most selfless act. Maybe I have a slanted view, I have been home for 11 years. I have struggled with that for all 11 of them too. As I age, I see how selfless it is to be home with these little creatures...er... i mean cheribs.

I hate to be a economy pessimist, but I don't think our getting a job would get us out of the 3 trillion+ debt we are in. ( now that was a selfish comment!) Anyway, it's odd that the words hurt so much.

Thanks for your support.

Karen, Thanks so much for your nice words. That was about the only retort I said in the entire verbal assult. I said, that I would be happy to share the frozen crickets, minnows, and grubs with anyone that came to the door.
K~