Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Many tasks lie ahead, next to and behind me

So here I sit.  I have so many tasks ahead and so many under my belt.  I don't know where I came from or where to go next.  I do run a list.  I do check it off.  The most important things do seem to get done.  That's a good thing, but some how other important things don't.  The list goes and my tension rises.  Well kind of.  The other night I realized that I have lost most of my "flight" part of "fright, flight, freeze or faint"  I have fright, I kind of freeze ( I guess ) and it's hard for me to faint, I never really had that at all.  I am sure I shared the story about the time I was finally alone in the house.  I was all bundled in my nest and then I smelled something burning.  I sat there.  Just the same as I was before I smelled something burning.  The only mood that came over me was maybe, slight disdain.  My shoulders went down and all I could think was "man... something is really on fire and now I have to get up and check on it " sigh.  "man"  I didn't have any feeling to get up.  none what so ever.  I'm not looking deep into it.  It's just an observation.  It is kind of how I take my tasks now.  I add stuff to the list.  I look at it.  I think... sigh... now how can I possibly not do this one or that one, but then when I turn my head my eye catches a crap-a-stack, a needy animal, a needy child, a pretty color, a craft undone, the clock (that should mean something but it doesn't) or pretty much anything else, the list goes away and then I am onto something else.  But I am not unique, I know this.  Each of us can write what I just did.  We all know this feeling, well maybe most would be more reactive to something burning in their home, I'm talking about life and it's tasks.  Lots to do.  Lots to do.  K~

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